Dear Friends,

I am grateful to be back in Mankato after two and a half weeks away, grateful for the necessary rest that this congregation granted to me in the form of professional study leave and personal vacation. And grateful because I am so tired, so very tired. I am tired of Covid-19. I am tired of uncertainty. I am tired of making and unmaking plans. I am tired of on again-off again in-person worship and Children’s Faith Development. I am tired of having my life and routines disrupted. I spent a week with ministers who are also tired, so very tired. Ministers whose congregations also are so very tired.

I wish I had the humor and pizazz to sing “I’m Tired” by Marlene Dietrich or even Madeline Kahn .  But it’s really not that funny. Life in these days is frustrating and irritating and upsetting and anxiety-producing and sad. Yes, there are many moments of grace, many moments of opportunity for growth and learning, and I do not discount those. But they do not make up for all that is lost. They do not make up for all that is difficult. They do not make up for the longing we have that things can go back to the way they were. But that is not going to happen.

One thing that is not going to go back exactly to the way it was is the Fellowship and worship. You maybe waiting to return to worship, waiting for it to be like it was before. I feel that sense of loss you are experiencing. But we will be online moving forward, because there will always be congregants for whom the in-person format will no longer work. And we will practice safe interactions—with masks and distancing and without sharing food and drink—until transmission rates drop drastically in our region. And we will not resume choir for a bit longer. These are deep losses, heart-felt losses. And they are signs of how our world has changed.

Yet, I hear a call to transform what was into what we need now. I hope you hear it too. A call to take a risk and entire a Sanctuary that looks and feels different but which bears the traces of years of love and devotion. A call to move forward as a song leader, bringing our voices once again into concert with one another. A call to serve in Children’s Chapel, giving your children and yourself the time to feel once again that you are part of something larger than your own individual lives. Many of us are heeding this call. I invite you to listen. I invite you into conversation about how you can answer. I invite you to once more enter into this Fellowship with your presence, your gifts, and your skills. Much is changed, but all is not lost.