Dear Friends,

Our Soul Matters theme for the month of March is “Wisdom,” and I approach it with no little trepidation. I am, as most of us are, well-acquainted with the close cousin of wisdom—knowledge. I know what a body of knowledge looks like. I know what research looks like. I know what study, even mastery, of a subject matter looks like. I know to seek out authoritative books and websites when I want to gain knowledge. But wisdom is another matter. What is it, and how might any of us acquire it?

There are many efforts to define “wisdom,” such as Martin H. Fischer’s definition “Knowledge is a process of piling up facts; wisdom lies in their simplification” or Lin Yutang’s “Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.” But who’s to say these are the answers? Or that there are not many more?

While in family therapy some years back, I learned some distinctions that guide my own efforts toward wisdom. We learned that when a person is in need of healing, all feelings are valid feelings. Some thoughts, though, might need to be corrected. This is because they are in error and thus destructive for trying to live a healthy and authentic life. One might, for example, feel worthless, which is a valid though painful feeling, but to think one is worthless because one is imperfect or disabled or queer is an erroneous and destructive thought that calls out for correction.

Alongside this important distinction between valid feelings and erroneous thoughts is the notion of “wise mind.” A posture of “wise mind” enables us to hold the balance between inevitable feelings and life-killing thoughts, to recognize that our feelings about life and ourselves emerge from many factors we often have no control over. In that balance, we weigh and evaluate our thoughts in a calm and clear manner that is not harmful to our psyches and our attempts to live a good life. In “wise mind,” we pause and grow aware of the distinction between the truth of our emotions and the reality of larger circumstances.

May we live in that wise balance, today and every day, as you remember you are loved, you are worthy, you are welcome, and you are needed. May you feel it so, and may it be so.

Blessings, Rev. Rita